Mothering Ourselves: Session II Love Letters

Eye to Eye: Black Women Hatred and Anger

(companion poem “In the House of Yemenja” or “BlackStudies”)

What is your first memory of hatred? What is your first memory of anger?

What is the difference between hatred and anger in your experience?

What anger, fear or hatred do you feel towards other members of your oppressed group?

What desire, anxiety, hope and love do you feel towards fellow members of your oppressed group?

Write a love letter to someone you are angry at, afraid of, competitive with.

What does it mean that “we can learn to mother ourselves”?

What does it mean to find a community “that will not turn away”

I don’t know about y’all, but at the Spirithouse/BrokenBeautiful Press discussion of Eye to Eye: Black Women Hatred and Anger folks went DEEP! In fact at the “end” of the discussion we felt that there were so many insights to process that we needed a couple of days. We decided to write letters to each other (and maybe to some other folks we want to relate to in the new light of what we learned from Eye to Eye).  Post your thoughts in the comments section! Below is brilliant passage by young Brazilian Scholar/Writer/Sister/Friend Monique Paes about what it might mean to mother ourselves:

women, mulheres,mujeres…

there comes a time in a womans life when her worth is put into question, she questions her worth and forgets her original inestimable value…. this is a time of reflection, it is a dire time for self-analyzation and self preservation and RE-evaluation. It will never be an easy task, but she must hold strong to her principles, whatever they may be, even if they are whimsical. At that time she may compare herself with other women that went before her and those that will come after her, she is in the middle of the road and both sides are apertando-ela*, with her feet on the ground and her eyes towards the sky, she is the intermediate, she IS the change, she is herself at that moment, and she is above all else strong. There is a sense of urgency for her to accomplish, motherhood and a career…awaken…just because you are not yet a mother, or perhaps will never be, you are still a mother to yourself, you are your primary care giver, your primary lover, you awaken the strength within yourself to TAKE CARE of yourself, for how can you take care of others had you not known what it is to love and care for yourself first? It is at that time that she must REMEMBER that unconditional self love is quintessential to survival, and her worth is beyond measure, because she is an original woman and none other will ever be like her after her. Set your pace, and walk your own dream….your evolution comes in small steps, take your own time.

~monique b paes~

*Squeezing her