Comments for Summer of Our Lorde

Comment on Discussion: Session I Uses of Anger by 30 ways to ease the pain after break-up via FemmeCast « jivata sutras.spirit threads

Fri, 22 May 2009 15:30:54 +0000

[...] 17- make a list: the 50 reasons why you have lost the best thing you have ever had This sounds pretty fantastic. I might just do this list. Look out for it on the blog. Early on, Coach B asked me to write a list of why I am amazing. At first I was really intimated and unsure of myself and why I would write it….and then one day I got mad and wrote a pretty amazing list- I surprised myself (to be posted later). Anger can be useful. [...]

Comment on Thus Saith by better questions « no snow here

better questions « no snow here — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 15:16:43 +0000

[...] 23 08 2008 from The Summer of Our Lorde: What is your first memory of hatred? What is your first memory of anger? What is the difference [...]

Comment on Thus Saith by rebecca walker

rebecca walker — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 09:13:45 +0000

I have used Sister Outsider as a touchstone now for fifteen years. I have engaged the question of anger in several different ways at different points in my life. There were times I didn’t feel the need to look at my anger critically. Times I felt entitled to injure others, just because I could. Times when I felt I needed to be free of anger, to open myself up and become a vast space of peace and vulnerability. Today I think anger is an extremely powerful force to be handled with great care, by people who have the skill and spiritual practice to administer it to cause transformation but not harm. Not unlike the healer who knows how to use snake venom to antidote a snake bite. Very few people can handle such a toxic substance with skill, as a means of healing. Better to work to become that person, than to make a mistake and let one’s anger cause more suffering than good.

Comment on Discussion: Session I Uses of Anger by Kismet

Kismet — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 18:39:49 +0000

Lex, Lex, Lex,

Where would the world be without you?

I also posted this as a comment at Firewalking women….

Yesterday women of color came together to think about Audre Lorde’s words and to think about our anger.

our collective definition is here: http://iwannalive.wordpress.com/2008/07/17/we-define-it/

Comment on Discussion: Session I Uses of Anger by alexis

alexis — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 12:00:06 +0000

Hey Sis!
Thanks so much for your thoughtful response to the Uses of Anger essay. What you say about anger threatening to implode really resonates with me. i realized…during my intense anger about the duke lacrosse case…that the referential image of my anger is actual the explosion of the 16th street baptist church. that’s literally what i see when i’m repressing my anger, trying to hold it in so the world doesn’t explode.
and you’re so right…it’s so directly related to misogyny and gender dynamics in our movement. i wrote some about that a while ago here: http://thatlittleblackbook.blogspot.com/2006/10/little-girl-parts-or-i-may-not-get.html

Comment on Discussion: Session I Uses of Anger by moya

moya — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 02:29:57 +0000

Anger is a scary thing to me and seems to come from a place of expectation. One must have an expectation that is violated or unmet, which can result in anger. I learned about anger from my father who expected a lot from me that I wasn't always able to deliver. It was frightening and hurtful not to meet his expectations. Consequently, I generally bite back my own anger, especially when it comes up in the context of people I'm close to because it hurt me so much. I can be angry with the president, a misogynist rapper or two, systems of oppression, but friends and family, not so much. It usually results in passive aggressive behavior where I swallow feelings that can turn into resentment or I sever ties, not at all good strategies for building healthy community. The essay reminds us that it is better to speak when angry than to turn away when things are difficult. It also calls on you who is receiving anger to bear it. To be a witness and not cloak oneself in guilt so that you are not held responsible. My anger might look like self implosion if I'm not careful. Needless to say the first step to fixing a problem is recognizing you have one. I'm actively trying to work on that piece of myself. Anger and privilege that's tricky. I think a lot of Lorde's anger was directed at privilege white women wanted to remain unaccountable for. I think that is definitely connected to the outward anger that fuels my activism. I'm hesitant to say that carries over to interpersonal conflict but I suppose a friend's sense of entitlement, or someone close to you getting preferential treatment could also produce anger. I think I return to unmet expectations as the primary anger producer in my close relationships which isn't always about privilege. I'm curious about how we respond to what we perceive to be unwarranted anger. How do we hold the space when folks bring us something that we can't perceive as being something to be upset about? To return to the social justice context, I get so angry, livid even, about the way misogyny is not recognized by men. I feel like i'm jumping up and down screaming "don't you understand that people violate me (my sisters) without consequence?!" and men (some men) are like "well that's not my problem because I didn't do that to you." How do we hold folks accountable that don't want to be held?

Comment on Better to Read! by giovanna

giovanna — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 05:21:41 +0000

it is refreshing to know that women of color are organizing to exchange knowledge. just that alone does not happen enough, and we need to learn from one another. it’s imperative to know what we are fighting for, rather the fix our gaze solely on what we are fighting against. and please let me know if incite d.c. has anything going on.

Comment on Thus Saith by cheryl clarke

cheryl clarke — Fri, 04 Jul 2008 18:20:08 +0000

uses of anger is very important as is eye to eye. i am very interested in the “uses” of anger, and like lorde, see it as a resource for us. it is cleansing, productive, and necessary. but i like your question about anger’s connection to privilege. some people who have privilege use anger to get more of what they want. because most people, esp. women, are afraid of anger. the press claims michele obama is an angry black woman–well, as if black women don’t have reasons to be angry. they are lucky angry is all we are. cheryl clarke

Comment on Better to Read! by Woman of Color

Woman of Color — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 16:45:17 +0000

I’m so down it doesn’t make sense. I need this in my bones. I’m going to see if the Incite-DC folks are interested in a home tea…